Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Belonging

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. 
Ephesians 1:3-6
     
     Adoption has been on my mind of late. It is not surprising since I recently house-sat along with my teenage nieces and my nephew while my sister and brother-in-law were in Ethiopia finalizing their adoption. Last Friday, I met my new nephew, a shy 7-year-old who knows only a few words of English. It is a very exciting time for us all.

     The week before we met him, most of us were dreaming of this boy and his integration in the family. Some dreams were telling and provoke prayer, like the one I had weeks ago of him being terrified. Others are just silly and reflect our excitement, like one a niece had where he showed up speaking fluent English. Whatever the dreams, one thing is certain: This young man will be welcomed into this home and into this family with great joy. He will be loved. He will no longer be an orphan and an outcast. He will belong.

     It is no small thing to belong, to become a part of a family. I am sure that is why Paul mentions it multiple times as a picture of the Gentiles being brought in to the family of God. When we are in Christ, we are more than just forgiven. We are adopted, no longer spiritual orphans and outcasts but now members of the household of God. We are sons and daughters; His children whom He treasures. We are no longer alone in this world and without hope. We now have a Father, a Brother, a Guide.

     Adoption, however, also has its adjustments. My nephew has a bright smile, but he was at times reserved and a little awkward. I saw it most when the rest of us were talking and he just sat there, not knowing what we were saying and clearly a little overwhelmed by the whole experience. He does not know these people who now call him "son" and  "nephew." He does not even know the words they say. He certainly does not know what will be expected of him in this new arrangement nor if he will be left behind once again. He has a whole culture and language to learn. He is home, but it may take some time before he feels at home.

      Adoption into the family of God takes adjustment, too. I know that when I began my walk with Christ, I was not really sure what I should look like or how I should act. I knew that I wanted to be with Him, knew that I loved Him, but I was awkward, unsure of my role, insecure. I was ignorant, too, of His will and it took some time for Him to teach me how to behave as His child. He is teaching me still.
   
     My experience with meeting my nephew, though needfully brief, has given me much food for thought.  When it became obvious that he was growing more uncomfortable and uncertain, his brother invited him outside where they all began to kick around a soccer ball. Play, it seems, is the universal language of children and in this realm, he could communicate. He laughed, he visibly relaxed, and I can hope he caught a glimmer of the fact that he is actually accepted, that he belongs. It has reminded me of the tremendous amount I have learned since my initial acceptance into the family of God. I do not look like I did back then when there was much that I did not yet know.Watching M___ play with his new siblings and my own kiddos reminded me of the importance of welcoming new brothers and sisters in Christ just where they are.

     Often, I think, we expect new Christians to simply switch gears suddenly and walk and talk exactly like us--often without a thought as to whether or not our own walk is worth emulation. Most of them, however, have not yet learned what is expected of them from their Father. Many need to learn a whole new language and culture. I am not speaking of "churchese" here, nor of our American churchy culture, but the language of love that is the heart of God and how He speaks to His children; the culture of genuine humility, repentance, and forgiveness that is critical to the dying to oneself that every Christian is called to. It takes some time before the wall of pride is penetrated and true humility shines through. Forgiveness is learned by learning more of what God in Christ has already forgiven us. Love is learned by being loved, by the overflow of Christ's love in us that cannot stay contained but bursts forth and spills out on all.


     Watching my kids, nieces, and nephews play reminded me that the most important thing I can do for a new believer is to love them. Difficult conversations may be necessary at times, just as I am sure that disciplinary actions will have to be taken with M___. After all, love does not mean ignoring sin or wrong action, but rather correcting it appropriately. But overall, the greatest thing I can extend to a new believer is welcome, reaching out in love and finding some way to connect with them, to show them that they are accepted. I can reach past any and all cultural boundaries that may exist and embrace them as a brother or sister, a new addition to the family of God. 

So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the cornerstone, in whom the whole structure, being joined together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord. In him you also are being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit. Ephesians 2:19-22


No comments:

Post a Comment