Asocial Media?

     It's true, I use some of the social media services. I am blogging, for instance, and I am something of a feast-or-famine facebooker. However, I have to admit that I have some misgivings about some of these tools, or at least about some of our motives in wielding them. There is an addictive quality to social media that almost anyone who has tried one out can attest to; something appealing in scrolling through the various status updates and random pictures that others post that seems to bring some level of satisfaction. We are in the know. We can give our opinions, share our witty comments, and make our point.

     They are tools also, and are not always used strictly for diversion. It is possible to make a political statement or share a passage of Scripture, a spiritual lesson, or a well-crafted article. We can make others laugh, maybe share a little joy. These examples and many others inculde some of the positive uses of social media. As I scroll through lists of updates, however, it is the more frivolous applications that occupy the most space. The fact is that the majority of us use them more for entertainment rather than with purpose and meaning. And, frankly, we Americans are already over-entertained.

     It is, however, the less obvious but possibly more destructive potential that I see which worries me. It is in status updates, tweets, and texting--none of them harmful in their own right, mind, but there is a serious danger which lurks as a possibility. Allow me to state loud and clear that it is not a problem for those who use these tools as just that--useful tools to be picked up when needed and laid aside again when the task is done. The people that concern me are the ones longing for companionship, desperately striving to electronically fill a need for relationships; it is the kids who learn to text and tweet before they learn how to fruitfully work out a problem or express their deepest longings, hurts, dreams, and joys to another--these are the ones who give me pause. These are the addicts, the restless-thumbed junkies always needing a fix without realizing that they are settling for a counterfeit to the very basic human need for relationship.

     Ultimately, there is good that can be done with facebook, as with all the rest. I  know people whom I cannot call because of either time or schedule differences and whose family photos I would never see without facebook. I know pastors and lay people who post thought-provoking and challenging quotes, proverbs, and passages of Scripture. I admit a personal desire to enter the world of texting, just for those grocery-store moments where a text would be more efficient than engaging in a conversation because all I really need is to remember the name of the new brand of deodorant my husband is using. Then again, I wonder how many hours are burned by me alone in my "quick checks" on facebook. . . All of these things can be a great boon, but the hours that are burned in tiny increments can stack up to become a massive burden in time.

     When it comes to that, it also scares me a little to see so many people hunger for that next shot, the instant gratification, but never taking the time to have coffee and a genuine, intimate conversation with a friend. It is easier and less chaotic at times to be "friends" on facebook, for you can ignore a facebook friend without them ever knowing or feeling slighted, and you can be ignored without feeling any injury or hurt. It is a simple matter to "like" whatever you feel defines you (at least at the moment), and there is not the complication and hassle of emotion nor the tediousness of having to be intentional in showing love and forgiveness. Online, there is often little to forgive.

     It makes me uneasy to think that there are people who do not realize that the messiness of concrete relationships is part and parcel of the reality of them.  Let's face it, no matter what angle you take, it is perfectly simple to conduct a facsimile of a friendship through social media, and it is so much cleaner--because it is not real. It's like seeing through a mirror dimly. Let's just make sure we never forget to take time to see face-to-face.

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.

Hebrews 10:23-25

Scripture quotations are from the ESV^® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version^®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

 

Hope

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.

Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace.

In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints,

Ephesians 6:10-18



I have spent the last several days processing the Aurora, Colorado shootings. I have a deep sorrow for those among the victims who may have died without Christ. I am heartbroken for the families who lost members and who have no hope because they do not know and trust the Lord. I ache for the injured who are grappling to make sense of this thing which would be senseless, save for the fact that I know that we are in the midst of a spiritual war. For those who are unaware of that fact, what happened is purposeless horror, and my heart is crushed for them. I even feel pain for James Holmes, the man who stormed in, guns blazing and left a bloodbath in his wake, for he, too, has been most heinously deceived. Yesterday, I read that at least one family had begun a lawsuit against the theater, of all things. This, too, grieves me, because these people are desperately lashing out, trying to find someone to blame and some way to exact retribution.


The truth be told, there is someone to blame. Satan, that deceiver of old, the accuser of man and of God, the restless destroyer whose fate is sealed and who is all the more fiercely determined to mock God and to delude and devastate that part of creation which was originally crafted in God's image. That ancient dragon's schemes are relentless and I am sure the anger, the bitterness, even the lawsuits that are budding will bloom into a sickly-sweet aroma of victory for him.

Not all will let him triumph, however. He is not the only character in this story; he is merely the usurper whose rule has been exposed as evil and overturned, and he is wreaking havoc until the return of the King. The fact is, God originally gave dominion over His creation to Adam, but Adam turned his back on God, choosing disobedience over leadership and thus ceding his authority to Satan. That old goat has gloated over this triumph since and has attempted to hold the entire world in his sway, propagating lies and striving to undermine God's truth.

God, of course, intervened and sent his Son to pay the ransom for Adam's choice, and thus the serpent's rule was challenged and proved false. There will come a day when the Son will come and claim what is rightfully His, but in the meantime the devil is battling to annihilate and con as much of humanity as he may drag away from service to the proper King.

All of the tragedies that play out on earth are symptoms of this greater, more invisible battle. Trying to make sense of this or any other terrible event without understanding the role of sin or the greater spiritual battle that rages behind it is like trying to cure an illness without knowing what a virus or a bacterium is. In both cases, a person may hit close to the mark quite by accident, but there will be no true grasp of what has been done.


No matter how dark the hour or how cheerless the news seems, there is still hope. For God is still alive and active in this story as He is in all others. There is good news in this calamity; hope in the face of obvious evil. That hope lies in Jesus. He alone is the true Victor, and He offers His peace to all who will come freely, trusting in Him and Him alone. It seems senseless, perhaps, but if there is a greater spiritual battle going on, then there is a greater reality behind what we can see. We can sense it; for all of us have a deep, inner perception that there is Something greater than us, whether we choose to acknowledge it or not. As children, we knew it unquestioning; as adults we often discount it as fantasy, though we are drawn to it. Superman, Spiderman, X-Men--all of them a human fabrication of that gripping desire for Good to conquer Evil in the end.


The fact is, Good will conquer evil in the end. The war has already been won, and what remains is the enemy's desperate skirmishes as he attempts to destroy the realm that has been wrested from him before the appointed time of its reclamation. Things will get uglier before the end--that much has been foretold as well. But in the end, those who trust in Christ will overcome. In Him, we are more than conquerors (Romans 8:37). In Him, we can take heart, for He has already overcome the world (John 16:33). In Him, we will find that peace that passes all understanding to guard our hearts and minds (Philippians 4:7). In Him we meet the God Who Sees, the God Who Heals, the Rock, the Comforter, the Ancient of Days who never changes and whose love endures forever. In Him alone can we make sense of this increasingly senseless world. In Him we have hope, not because of anything that happens in this world, but that even after our bodies wear down and expire, our future is secure. Won't you trust fully in Him today? His offer stands--it is up to you to accept it.

Scripture quotations are from the ESV^® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version^®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Value

     Just the other day as I was working in my garden and contemplating the possible refinance of our house, it struck me how incredibly wealthy I am. Honestly, the weight of it took my breath away. What I realized was this: I live in a country privileged enough to assess the value of a property by its attractiveness and convenience rather than the feasibility of obtaining food from it.

     That may seem like a small thing, but I assure you it is not. It was not many decades ago that any one of us would have given the majority of our time to the collecting and preparing of food for storage, hoping only to stock up enough to pull us through the winter. The value of a place of residence would have been in the sturdiness of the structure, the nearness to a water supply, and the possibility of having a milk cow or two, some live beef, a few chickens for eggs and meat, and a sunny place to grow food. Our concern would not have been in having a perfectly balanced diet, but in having enough food for the year so that we could have any kind of diet at all.

    This thinking led me to remember that, in many places, people still live this way. There are children who have never had a full belly in their lives. There are moms whose daily hope is that they can lug home enough muddy water to keep their families alive for one more day. These do not have the luxury of deciding not to cook a particular dish because they prefer the taste of something else; if they have food, they eat it. Many do not have mattresses or bed frames--many do not even own shoes. To so many people in this world, the idea of decorating a living space or color-coordinating fabrics, carpets, and paint is an utterly foreign and entirely frivolous thought. If they could step into any one of our homes, they would be awed by the sheer sumptuous nature of our lifestyle. A trip to Target or Wal-Mart would be totally overwhelming as they tried to take in the sheer volume of stuff. The gadgets and gizmos that many of us take for granted would be down right shocking to those who are not even in the habit of having basic needs met.

     We are truly wealthy. I do wonder, though, for how long? Can this opulence last forever? Can it even last many more decades? It is a sobering thought to realize how fragile a thing our wealth truly is. A good string of natural disasters could reduce us to basic needs again--fighting to feed our families, to find clean water, hoarding our existing clothing and food. I wonder how long it would take us to redefine our ideals of value.

     I suppose these are not happy thoughts. With the current drought, the other natural disasters in recent years, the rising costs of fuel and groceries, and the continued slowdown of our economy, it does not take a terribly creative mind to imagine a dire future in which these things only worsen. It is not difficult to foresee a future time when we are forced out of our affluent bubble into the harsh, cold reality that greets much of the world each morning.

     So what hope have we, then? Well, in truth, if what we value is comfort, pleasure and the pursuit thereof, assorted gadgetry, and the latest and greatest models of everything, then our hope is fragile indeed. These things will certainly fail us sooner or later, and none is guaranteed--at least not without the purchase of an extended warranty.

     There is, however, one thing of value that we can cling to even if we should be faced with financial ruin, economic and social collapse, or any major disaster imaginable. That is the Kingdom of God. It is a thing of eternal and unparalleled worth that will never diminish in value or break. If we surrender our lives to Christ, we are promised a place in that House that will not perish. But surrender we must, laying aside all that we hold dear to cling to Him and Him alone.

     Once we have truly and completely yielded to Him, giving Him preeminence in our hearts; making Him the focus, the crux, the motivation by which we live and work and draw breath; then we find that He will allow us to keep some--but not all--of what we have gladly relinquished for His sake.

     You see, He requires only our entire allegiance, and He will suffer no rival, be it so small a thing as a favorite hobby or a teeny-tiny little addiction to technology -- or anything else. The beauty part, however, is that He is the most valuable Person we can ever meet, and His Kingdom is everlasting. Once we devote ourselves completely to Him, loving others because He first loved us and abiding in Him, utterly wrapped up in preoccupation with Him, His love, and to His service --we have found something of supreme worth. We will then find that His words to "Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things [our daily needs] will be added to you," are true. The difference is, they will no longer have any hold on us.

For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, "Abba! Father!" The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs--heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him. For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Romans 8:14-18

Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, saying, 'This man began to build and was not able to finish.' Or what king, going out to encounter another king in war, will not sit down first and deliberate whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand? And if not, while the other is yet a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks for terms of peace. So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple.
Luke 14:27-33

 Scripture quotations are from the ESV^® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version^®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Mess

Where there are no oxen, the manger is clean, but abundant crops come by the strength of the ox. Proverbs 14:4

This is the refrain that I keep repeating to myself at this season of my life, although my version goes something more like this:

Where there are no children, the house is clean, but abundant joy comes by the company of a child.

I think this to myself as I scan my house. The stained carpet. The remote-control-car-battered baseboards. The stray colored pencil left by my creative one. The hand prints in funky places on the walls. The multitude of books lying half-read and scattered across the living room sofa. The socks abandoned inexplicably on the stairs in the middle of summer. The relentless duties of cooking, cleaning up, and laundry. The room full of homeschool materials. The endless stream of crafts, drawings, party favors, toys, and assorted oddments that have taken up residence in my home. The closets and drawers that I can never quite find the energy to organize. And so on and so forth.

If I had no children, it is true that much of this would be a non-issue. I would have a smaller, cleaner home. I would have sparkling windows, freshly-painted everything, maybe even a well-tended garden. My dogs would behave. I may not even have dogs. Or cats. And so on and so forth.

But there is so much I would miss... The sweet morning greeting of a still-sleepy child. The spontaneous hugs. The hilariously random things they say. The precious moments snuggled up sharing a book or movie together. Giggles and shrieks of laughter. That deep, adoring gaze that I sometimes catch in a quiet moment. The delicious moment when you have encouraged them in a way that no one else can quite manage. The endless stream of drawings, love notes, and homemade gifts. The excitement of birthdays, Christmas morning, and Easter. The "Ah-Ha!" moments when something clicks as we read the Bible together. The privilege of seeing them grow to love the Lord. The somewhat scary, somewhat exhilarating feeling of watching them grow from a tiny, helpless newborn to young men and women. The wonder of seeing the world for the first time all over again through their eyes. And so on and so forth.
I am glad for my not-perfectly-clean house, or at least for the reason behind it. True, raising children is the most challenging and difficult job I have ever had. It is simultaneously frustrating and rewarding. It is humbling and it it causes me to rely on God in ways I probably never would have otherwise. It is scary when I think of the consequences of failing, of the many painful things that can happen, of the hardships that they may have to endure. However, it is also the most intensely powerful emotional experience I have ever had, and it has given me new insight on what it means to be God's child when I see what it means to be a parent.

And I choose to overlook my mess in favor of the awesome and enthralling privilege of loving these three small people and shepherding them into adulthood.

Scripture quotations are from the ESV^® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version^®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Trust

Nebuchadnezzar answered and said to them, "Is it true, O Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, that you do not serve my gods or worship the golden image that I have set up? Now if you are ready when you hear the sound of the horn, pipe, lyre, trigon, harp, bagpipe, and every kind of music, to fall down and worship the image that I have made, well and good. But if you do not worship, you shall immediately be cast into a burning fiery furnace. And who is the god who will deliver you out of my hands?"

Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego answered and said to the king, "O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. If this be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of your hand, O king. But if not, be it known to you, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up."

Daniel 3:14-18

     In recent weeks, God has been speaking to me about the things I trust in. I long to be a person who trusts in Him and Him alone, to say in adversity as Job said, "Shall we receive good from God, and  shall we not receive evil?" (Job 2:20). I know that in the past, I have often trusted more in my ability, but lately that seems to be sliding away. My memory, once nearly photographic in quality, is now spotty at best and has begun to fail me more often than it serves me. My hands, never exactly nimble, are experiencing spells of numbness and my fingers often feel awkward and clumsy. The energy I once had to get up early and stay up late, accomplishing so much in between times, is flagging and I find now that sleep claims me if I am still for very long. So much for ability!

     At first, these things and many others caused me a great deal of distress. I would agonize over the fact that I seemed to need wider margins than ever in my life and mentally flog myself over the many tasks I had forgotten. I found this idea of being stripped of my native abilities to be exasperating and distasteful, and I railed against it for a season. However, after some time of reflection, I have come to embrace it as this, too, is a reminder that while my "outer self is wasting away, [my] inner self is being renewed day by day," (See 2 Corinthians 4:16). In dislodging my self-reliance, God has caused me to more and more rely on Him to get things done. Of course, in order to do this, I must also learn to trust Him to set my schedule, an aspect of control that I find I am still struggling to disengage.

     As I have walked through this new season of my life and am becoming more at ease in it, I find myself questioning more and more where my trust truly lies. There have been times in the past where I was tested and proved false, my faith more in the abundance of provision or in the tranquility of my circumstance rather than in the Provider of both. Now, as I finally begin settling in to life as His servant, it is my fervent hope that I will trust in Him no matter what He allows to happen in my life.

     My hope has shifted, you see. My hope is not in God to save me from pain, from suffering, from debt, or from disease. My hope is simply in Him. Period. He has already saved me from sin, and for that I am eternally grateful. Whatever He allows in my life, I will choose to trust, though the way be difficult and the purpose be hidden from my sight. I know that He is my reward, not riches; He is my comfort, not circumstance; He is my portion, not health or abundance. Those are all wonderful gifts to have and to enjoy, but I know that tat any moment hey may be removed without warning or recompense. In the breadth of a heartbeat, everything that I hold dear may be snatched and my entire life can be altered--except for my Rock, the God in whom I trust. He alone will never change, He alone will never fade, and He alone is what I will cling to when the tides turn.

     In part, it is helpful for me to remember the many who have trusted in Him throughout history. Joseph--hated by his brothers, sold into slavery, imprisoned for a crime he refused to commit--remained steadfast and eventually was allowed a glimpse of God's purpose in his pain. Daniel--enslaved and his life threatened both by the temper tantrums of Nebuchadnezzar and the weak will of Darius--continued to trust in God and worship Him alone and was delivered. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego also declared that their God was able to deliver them from the fire, but even if He would not, they would still choose Him over the golden image. Job said, "Though He slay me, I will hope in Him," at a time when his family, his possessions, and even his health had been cut off.

     There are many others, none perfect but each a reminder that God is worthy, that He is true, that His ways are inscrutable to us and yet perfect in purpose and in timing. It is a blessing that we may occasionally glimpse the wonder of His plan, but it is no less a blessing to rest on the fact that we do not need to understand in order to trust Him. Not all of God's heroes saw their fortunes restored or themselves protected from evil. Paul was flogged, stoned, thrown in prison, and most likely beheaded for his service to the Lord. Isaiah was sawn in half for his faithfulness. Peter was crucified. The lives and deaths of these men, too, serve as reminders that our hope is in God alone and not in position or circumstance. However, once we can wrap our minds around the fact that He is our portion, our inheritance, and our reward, we will finally have true peace, knowing that whatever our lot may be, our Father has His hand in it and will bring about His good. When we live only for His glory and pleasure and not for our own, we will never again go unsatisfied.

Scripture quotations are from the ESV^® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version^®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Face, Unveiled

         Such is the confidence that we have through Christ toward God. Not that we are sufficient in ourselves to claim anything as coming from us, but our sufficiency is from God, who has made us competent to be ministers of a new covenant, not of the letter but of the Spirit. For the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life.
     Now if the ministry of death, carved in letters on stone, came with such glory that the Israelites could not gaze at Moses' face because of its glory, which was being brought to an end, will not the ministry of the Spirit have even more glory? For if there was glory in the ministry of condemnation, the ministry of righteousness must far exceed it in glory.   Indeed, in this case, what once had glory has come to have no glory at all, because of the glory that surpasses it. For if what was being brought to an end came with glory, much more will what is permanent have glory.

      Since we have such a hope, we are very bold, not like Moses, who would put a veil over his face so that the Israelites might not gaze at the outcome of what was being brought to an end. But their minds were hardened. For to this day, when they read the old covenant, that same veil remains unlifted, because only through Christ is it taken away. Yes, to this day whenever Moses is read a veil lies over their hearts. But when one turns to the Lord, the veil is removed. Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.

2 Corinthians 3:4-18

     When I look in the mirror these days, I am sometimes amazed, sometimes dismayed at the face peering back at me. It is not an old face just yet, though the lines that once vanished along with my smile or frown now linger. It is not a young face, either, as those lingering lines are accompanied by age spots and the whites of my eyes are not quite white anymore. It is a face in transition.

     For a moment, I focus on the eyes. They are not as bright as they once were. They have seen many things both of stunning beauty and gut-wrenching horror. Their vision is less crisp than it once was, and creases are forming at their corners and on the brow where I frequently squint to keep the world in focus, forgetting time and again to wear my glasses. However, as the outer eyes fade, my spiritual eyes are becoming sharper than ever.

     In my youth and early adulthood, when my physical eyes were at their peak in performance and in attractiveness, I was inwardly blind. Spiritually, I was a stone-cold blind girl following blind guides down a road that seemed innocuous but became more bitter and more clearly bent to destruction as I staggered along the way. My world was destruction, I felt, and so I cared not where the road took me. I was chained, it seemed, by guilt, by abhorrent things I had done or seen, but a conscience seared nearly to the point of numbness -- but not quite. The further I walked, the more my blindness became wilful, a desperate attempt to not see what was glaringly obvious before me. I felt myself doomed to walk this road and walked without hope and with dwindling remorse.

     I did, however, come to a point where I was beyond myself. My strength was gone and I could travel under the burden of the chains I carried. I cried out hopelessly to a God I did not believe in and challenged Him to show Himself if He was, indeed, real. In His mercy, He not only disclosed Himself to me, He healed my blindness and freed me from those hateful chains, one by one. Those eyes, once so utterly -- and even purposefully -- blind, now see clearer with each new day even as the eyes peeking back from the mirror are beginning the relentless decline of age. In them I see pain, sorrow, and suffering, but also something new--hope.

Stripped of the scales, my eyes see the world in a new way, more unmistakable each day. My eyes see people struggling under burdens similar to the ones I once needlessly carried. They see the pain etched behind the smiles, the helpless grief behind the sobs. My eyes see with a new compassion and a longing to share the hope that is within me--the hope of a Lord who is mightier than the most overwhelming grief, who has shared in suffering and overcome--the hope of a King who reclaims and redeems, who offers a hope imperishable and a peace inconquerable quite despite circumstances that would otherwise leave only desolation. My eyes are seeing more and more like His, as He becomes greater and I become less.

     My gaze travels down to the mouth. This, too, is faintly showing signs of succumbing to the passing of time; past its prime but not yet aged. This mouth once spouted arrogance and even blasphemous things. It had moments of cruelty, cutting down people with vicious jabs and thrusts of words. It was a weapon used to carve out a wide swath of space to separate myself from others and to recklessly defend that berth. It was haughty, proud, disdainful, and cold, but it was also a mouth weaving words intended to mask a lonely and miserable soul. It was a mouth frightened to admit failure, mistake, or defeat.

     Now those lips are unafraid to confess crimes. When they are again used as a weapon, repentance follows, for the intent for this mouth now is to speak words of encouragement, healing, life, and truth. Sometimes words of rebuke must come, but gently now and without the venom that once tainted every word. Sorrow, too, and longing are spoken. Honesty and transparency has become the new goal, no longer shielding a broken soul but one mended and exposed and yet oddly invulnerable to this world, for now faith is no longer in survival of self but in dying to myself and clinging to the One who has overcome the world. This mouth now struggles against its old ways, and is often found vocalizing words of contrition and renewal, striving to reject unwholesome and destructive speech. It is a mouth in transition, being sanctified and purified, but not yet having achieved this end. As it ages, it mellows and is putting aside brutality and taking up nourishing and nurturing.

     The whole face, indeed, is losing its youth and becoming more mature in appearence. There is no question that I am no longer a young woman, but middle-aged. However, despite isolated moments of regret, overall I welcome age and I hope to have a face with character; a face whose smile lines far outnumber the creases of frowns. I hope to have a face that shines with an inner radiance--the radiance of the love of God and of a creature abiding in Him. I hope that, should I be allowed a long span of years, my face will be that of a woman full of patience and the peace that surpasses all understanding, mouth speaking words of truth and of wisdom, eyes shining with the light of love.

For it is all for your sake, so that as grace extends to more and more people it may increase thanksgiving, to the glory of God. So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.

2 Corinthians 4:15-16

Scripture quotations are from the ESV^® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version^®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Belief

Therefore, as the Holy Spirit says, "Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion, on the day of testing in the wilderness, where your fathers put me to the test and saw my works for forty years.

Therefore I was provoked with that generation, and said, 'They always go astray in their heart; they have not known my ways. As I swore in my wrath, 'They shall not enter my rest.'"

Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called "today," that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. For we have come to share in Christ, if indeed we hold our original confidence firm to the end.

As it is said, "Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion." For who were those who heard and yet rebelled? Was it not all those who left Egypt led by Moses? And with whom was he provoked for forty years? Was it not with those who sinned, whose bodies fell in the wilderness? And to whom did he swear that they would not enter his rest, but to those who were disobedient? So we see that they were unable to enter because of unbelief.

Hebrews 3:7-19

     As I have thought back through the sins of my lifetime, it seems to me that they are, without fail, rooted in unbelief. Even my pride, which I have found to be the sneakiest and meanest of sins, seems to be grounded in unbelief as well. I find that all my anxieties stem from a failure to truly, honestly believe in God's goodness and ability to provide. Pride rears up because I have put my own strength ahead of trust in God--once again, not believing in Him so much as in myself. As a side note, what a silly thing that is--to believe in the capacity of a cracked vessel rather than in the purpose of the One who formed that vessel. In that light, it seems a strange thing to believe in oneself.

     Those are merely a couple of examples, but I could go on. Fear, lust, hate, anger, gossip, slander, malice, and in every other way I may disobey I find that it originates in unbelief. I do not truly believe that God is God, that He is powerful, that He has overcome the world, that I will be accountable for every careless word I speak, and so on. I was convicted of this over and over, and I have been pondering it for weeks. If I truly believe the Bible is the true and inspired word of God, if I truly believe in His utter sovereignty, than I will live a different kind of life. I will live in awe and reverence, completely and irrevocably transformed by His great compassion and His might and power. And not just I, but all of us who claim His name.

     So my question is: Do we truly believe? I may have written this before, but it bears repeating. Do we believe in God the same way we believein George Washington? Yes, I believe that a man existed named George Washington, that he was a great leader, and that he did a lot of wonderful things. Believing this, however, does not change my life. I also believe in nursing infants and in training my children to walk with the Lord. Both of these believes have altered the way I live my daily life. Nursing a baby changed the products I bought, the structure of my days, and many other things. Teaching my own is also a lifestyle and not merely an intellectual acknowledgement, and it has completely turned my world upside down.
   
     My point is this: We, in confessing belief in the Lord Christ, must believe in such a way that it alters our lifestyle and changes our perspective. God is calling us to a belief much more practical than a verbal concession. He is calling us to a belief that transforms us, that brings our eyes off the transient and temporal things around us to the eternal things that we cannot see. He is calling us to love recklessly and without thought for recompense. He is calling us to believe that He is bigger and more powerful than our weakness and frailty. His calling is not to walk a path of safety, professing belief with our lips while walking in unbelief with our feet. He is calling us to abandon ourselves utterly to Him, trusting that even if He leads us through the valley of the shadow of death, He will never leave us there. He is calling us to a belief that goes beyond hymnals, music, and Bible study and goes out into our every day experience.

      For as I have come to see, a true belief and acceptance of Jesus as Lord over every element of my life brings me to my knees in awe, in repentance, and in abject submission because He is truly powerful and He is my King, my life... my everything. There is nothing outside of His power and no person beyond His grasp. His way is perfect, and I do not have to understand "why" but I can trust Him even when circumstances are beyond my grasp. The fact is, I could never understand "why" because I am a creation--God is Creator, infinite in wisdom and understanding, and His thoughts and ways are as far from mine as my thoughts and actions are from the insects in my garden. It has taken years, but finally I believe with an undivided heart.... and that realization has left me weak in the knees for the greatness of a God who can do such amazing things as ours has done, and yet has given Himself to atone for the horrendous things that I have done.

     Friends, this belief is no trifle, and this King is not to be trifled with either! He is a great and compassionate God, but He is also a holy and jealous God. He longs for us all to love Him as He has loved us, and yet He will never force us. Make no mistake, we will bear the consequence of our choice: Life changing belief will lead us to eternal life, or unbelief that ends in death. I urge us all today, myself included, to give ourselves with sheer abandon to complete acceptance of what the Bible says--not to study it and to puff ourselves up with knowledge that goes nowhere but only clogs our minds and hearts, but to live it out daily in our homes, with our spouses, in our churches, behind the wheel, in the grocery store, even in scrubbing the toilets. Let our every day and every breath be swallowed up in belief and in rejoicing that the Lord is truly and unequivocally good. If He is our portion and if it is in Him we trust, no circumstance nor dread can change that. Put your hope in God, for He alone is unchanging. As James writes, do not let yourselves be blown and tossed by the wind (James 1:5-8), but trust Him without reserve and believe Him with all your heart. There is no greater joy, and there is no greater peace than the Rock of our salvation!

Fret not yourself because of evildoers; be not envious of wrongdoers!

 For they will soon fade like the grass and wither like the green herb.

 Trust in the LORD, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday.

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!  

Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil. For the evildoers shall be cut off, but those who wait for the LORD shall inherit the land.

Psalms 37:1-9

Scripture quotations are from the ESV^® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version^®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.