For thus says the One who is high and lifted up, who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy: "I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly, and to revive the heart of the contrite.
Isaiah 57:15
As many of you probably have, I used the last few days of 2013 to do a little prayerful assessing of my life and activities. I am delayed in writing about it in part because I was busy doing it, and in the process I took a hiatus from computer usage. It was a good time, a time of rest in the Lord and rest from the clamor of the world, and it has left me with an unshakable impression. I have been very busy in the last few years, but busy doing what?
Oh, much of it is good stuff, of course. I am teaching my children and there are a lot of activities that go in with that. We have tutorials, 4-H, schoolwork, the regular ebb and flow of life. However, as I took this time to rest in the Lord, He began to make me examine all my activity in the light of eternity. They are all good--that much is without question! But are they best? He also has convicted me of my tendency to compare what I am doing or capable of doing with what other families do. I have some friends who are able to keep part-time freelance jobs, work at multiple tutorials and have their kids involved in them all, keep active in their churches, and still get all of life done. I am amazed by those folks! However, the Spirit of God clearly spoke to me in the last weeks and reminded me: I am not answerable to other people, but to Him. And I put the pressure to do more upon myself. He says, "Take My yoke upon you...for My yoke is easy and my burden is light." All of those things may be light and easy for some, but for me the mere thought of them overwhelms me. It is not my job to try to measure myself, my kids, or my home school against the activity and ability of others. It is my job simply to listen to and obey the voice of my Guide.
And I believe He is telling me to slow it down even further. To spend more time investing in eternity and in the sincere pursuit of personal holiness, because His name is Holy and He inhabits eternity. To focus my small energy on doing the work He has given me to do well, and to trust Him to show me each step of the way what those tasks are. I am not sure what this will look like yet, but I know that I am preparing myself to obey. I am praying that He will show me in His time, that He will give me clarity so that I know it is His voice I am responding to and to hear Him clearly through the clamor of noise this world has to offer.
As I have gone through this, I have developed the nagging suspicion that I have overly complicated my walk with Him, and that many of the stresses and busy-ness I have added to my life is just that: stress and busy-ness. I have begun to suspect that it is not His will that I am frantically trying to piece my days together and keep up with a zillion tasks and schedules, but that I can go about creating order within my home and my school so that on those days when He causes interruptions, both my family and myself are centered in His will and ready to recognize and handle those situations. I am left with the very strong impression that my modern-American way of "simplifying" my life is still not the quiet simplicity that He desires. We live in a fast-paced and noisy world brimming with opportunities and wonderful activities and entertainments. However, when I examine the Scriptures for guidance, it is not frenetic activity that I see Him praising. It is Mary, sitting attentively at His feet. It is those who were not too busy to be available when He called, or who were willing to leave their business behind to follow Him.
I have begun to really examine the things we do each day in the light of Eternity. Are they fulfilling our call to be holy as He is holy? Are they helping us to hear and obey His voice? Are they of eternal value, or will the benefit pass away within months or years? I don't have the answers just yet... but He does. What I do know is that He has told me in no uncertain terms that for the years to come, "He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?" (Micah 6:8)
Oh, Lord, help me to do just that! Keep me from distraction and keep me wholly focused on and fixed within Your will! May I live no longer for temporal comforts or good, but teach me to inhabit eternity with You. As Jehoshaphat prayed, so do I: Oh Lord, I do not know what to do, but my eyes are on You.
Oh, much of it is good stuff, of course. I am teaching my children and there are a lot of activities that go in with that. We have tutorials, 4-H, schoolwork, the regular ebb and flow of life. However, as I took this time to rest in the Lord, He began to make me examine all my activity in the light of eternity. They are all good--that much is without question! But are they best? He also has convicted me of my tendency to compare what I am doing or capable of doing with what other families do. I have some friends who are able to keep part-time freelance jobs, work at multiple tutorials and have their kids involved in them all, keep active in their churches, and still get all of life done. I am amazed by those folks! However, the Spirit of God clearly spoke to me in the last weeks and reminded me: I am not answerable to other people, but to Him. And I put the pressure to do more upon myself. He says, "Take My yoke upon you...for My yoke is easy and my burden is light." All of those things may be light and easy for some, but for me the mere thought of them overwhelms me. It is not my job to try to measure myself, my kids, or my home school against the activity and ability of others. It is my job simply to listen to and obey the voice of my Guide.
And I believe He is telling me to slow it down even further. To spend more time investing in eternity and in the sincere pursuit of personal holiness, because His name is Holy and He inhabits eternity. To focus my small energy on doing the work He has given me to do well, and to trust Him to show me each step of the way what those tasks are. I am not sure what this will look like yet, but I know that I am preparing myself to obey. I am praying that He will show me in His time, that He will give me clarity so that I know it is His voice I am responding to and to hear Him clearly through the clamor of noise this world has to offer.
As I have gone through this, I have developed the nagging suspicion that I have overly complicated my walk with Him, and that many of the stresses and busy-ness I have added to my life is just that: stress and busy-ness. I have begun to suspect that it is not His will that I am frantically trying to piece my days together and keep up with a zillion tasks and schedules, but that I can go about creating order within my home and my school so that on those days when He causes interruptions, both my family and myself are centered in His will and ready to recognize and handle those situations. I am left with the very strong impression that my modern-American way of "simplifying" my life is still not the quiet simplicity that He desires. We live in a fast-paced and noisy world brimming with opportunities and wonderful activities and entertainments. However, when I examine the Scriptures for guidance, it is not frenetic activity that I see Him praising. It is Mary, sitting attentively at His feet. It is those who were not too busy to be available when He called, or who were willing to leave their business behind to follow Him.
I have begun to really examine the things we do each day in the light of Eternity. Are they fulfilling our call to be holy as He is holy? Are they helping us to hear and obey His voice? Are they of eternal value, or will the benefit pass away within months or years? I don't have the answers just yet... but He does. What I do know is that He has told me in no uncertain terms that for the years to come, "He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?" (Micah 6:8)
Oh, Lord, help me to do just that! Keep me from distraction and keep me wholly focused on and fixed within Your will! May I live no longer for temporal comforts or good, but teach me to inhabit eternity with You. As Jehoshaphat prayed, so do I: Oh Lord, I do not know what to do, but my eyes are on You.
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